Today I went for a very wet and muddy run, my usual beautiful views were masked by cloud and mist and this almost seemed to resemble my current headspace where I have all of this information but I'm not sure what to put where. At first I didn't want to go, I wanted to stay in my warm and cosy surroundings at home but I thought of my progress made and that spurred me on.
I run on a trail with some breath taking views, today I could see the reservoir faintly through the mist almost as though this was my end product and the mist was the information I had to clear in order to get to the reservoir. I did get some rather muddy feet as I was concentrating on the obscured view rather than concentrating on where I was running!! I ran through the wet slippy leaves and thought about the uncertainty that I have felt at times throughout my MA, they slowed me down, but then I saw the end of my trail and that gave me the boost to keep going.
Today I was also faster, still quite slow, but if I look at how far I have come in a short time I can see what huge improvement has been made. I started running because I decided that with all the dancing I do I don't actually do anything for myself as I'm always teaching class for somebody else. The same with my MA I wanted to do it for myself, having done my PGCE out of necessity for my job I needed to continue and do something for me.
At times I thought I can't go out running I need to study but I also need my headspace and this has been working really well for me. It's taught me that its ok to feel unsure about what to do but you have to take that first step as you never know what you will discover. I felt the same at the start of my MA journey, I wonder if I will feel the same at the end of my journey as I do at the end of my run- out of breath, muddy, tired but at the same time jubilant.
This is a more impressive view taken during October half term.
No comments:
Post a Comment